Yeah, it happens a lot. One has to decide between your clan and your marriage. This post is to alert you to some stories, anecdotes, and resources to help you save your true love (or your marriage, too)

The most amazing WOW addiction Website I’ve found (even though I’m sure there’s many). Claims over 45,000 stories of addiction, recovery, (re-addiction), backsliding…. just read it, trust me.

Article in The Times (UK Edition) about women complaining that WOW is ruining their marriage.

Social networks also add to this trend, according to “Pixels and Policy”. Some law firms claim that virtual flirting accounts for 20% of divorces. Predominantly they are discussing Facebook, but inline chat is prevalent in most every online game.

Don’t expect Second Life to escape un-accused, either. Here’s the article, from CNN, in which the divorcing wife makes the strange-sounding accusation, ” “I looked at the computer screen and could see his character having sex with a female character. It’s cheating as far as I’m concerned.”

A divorce article from Divorce 360.

OK, this one is just strange. A soldier (serving his country in Iraq) comes home to find a “Mii” on the Wii, that looks almost identical to the male-friend his wife was having rumors surrounding. Read the post. Just strange.

Finally, a common-sense article that states the obvious. Facebook doesn’t cause cheating. Cheating sleazebags do. In other words; don’t blame the messenger. If your significant O is spending more time away from you with you…. do your best to be more interesting than whatever is pulling him/her away. Of course, sad to say, maybe he/she isn’t worth it. Obviously, I’m not a divorce lawyer; video-game lawyer… so yeah, MAKE SURE the video games worth it before you blow it all… remember, marriage is a lifetime but the video game will only be supported for 3-5 years tops.

Jay Moffitt is a Tennessee attorney. This blog is for entertainment and educational purposes only and does not consitute legal advice or create an attorney/client relationship. Jay Moffitt is not certified as a specialist in this area by Tennessee and Tennessee does not certify specialists in this practice area. All comments will be answered promptly and courteously as long as they are germane to the discussion and do not contain specific game names or incidents.

Poignant, poignant story. The avatar living in Second Life was slowly becoming more detached, less involved in the Second Life. And had stated in-game that because of necessary regular medication, she could choose dying simply by stopping the meds at any time. It is tragic, yet incredibly interesting how the signs were there in both SL and in RL(real life) of the sad, sad, ending to the story.

Another interesting article is Rights of Avatars by Raph Koster. It has incredible insights about avatars and the requisite fundamental rights one might attribute to them. And I’m aware that it is an almost 10-year-old blog post, but then again, it is still the most complete statement about the avatar as separate from the owner. You can also do worse than buying his book “Theory of Fun” from Amazon (Yes, I know I could link, but I don’t link commercial ventures on this site.)

Second Life Divorce tells the story of a real life (RL) divorce incited by a Second Life (SL) “affair?”, relationship, how would you term that exactly? Yes, it is a little creepy, but when you talk to divorce lawyers they will tell you of divorces caused by sandwiches being sliced on the diagonal rather than horizontal, or not replacing the toothpaste cap, it’s not surprising that an endeavor that takes both money and also time would inevitably cause friction in a marriage.

Dressing for an Interview in Second Life is a great article in the mainstream Wall Street Journal. Which begs the question, what if you arrive the first day at work, and you’re the “opposite sex” that they expect? Or 40 years older? Opens up a whole can of worms, wouldn’t you think?

And finally, the informative links: Our virtual bodies, ourselves and also “Through the Looking Glass”(Correlation with RL personality and online personality

The Proteus Theory has the best characterization I’ve ever read of online gaming’s nature; “And in online environments, the avatar is not simply a uniform that is worn, the avatar is our entire self-representation. Whereas the uniform is one of many identity cues in the studies mentioned earlier, the avatar is the primary identity cue in online environments. Thus, we might expect that our avatars have a significant impact on how we
behave online.”

This work may be Cited as “The Daedalus Project” by Nick Yee, available at: http://www.nickyee.com/daedalus. “What is the general methodology used? Links to online surveys are publicized on main portals catering to specific games. Respondents from past surveys are also notified of the available surveys. Most surveys are multiple choice and consist of 30-50 questions, and usually take about 5-10 minutes to complete. Approximately 2000-4000 respondents participate in each survey phase.”

3 for the B(usiness)
1. When you’re involved in litigation, remember in your online life (SL, WOW, Facebook, Myspace, Twitter) to restrict your “new” friends. Basically, if you can handle it psychologically, do not “friend” any new people during any litigious phase in your life. It might be a lawyer from the opposite side, or someone employed by them. It is still unclear how far an opposing party can go, see the interesting article by LLRX.

2. If you’re an attorney working on a RL case, it’s getting close to negligence to not make at least a passing reference to restricting online communications. Even if you don’t work in intellectual property, it is essential to question a new client about any “complications” especially in a case that is involving interpersonal relations.

3. Remember that anything you do online may eventually become known. If it is something you wish hidden, well, behave in such a way that it does remain hidden. I hope later to devote a whole post to the “testamentary” options in online games, especially SL – it is incredibly complex, and constantly evolving. Short story long, treat your online friends in the way you’d like to be treated, just like your RL friends; and just like in RL they will most likely take care of you.

Jay Moffitt is a TN attorney. The statements here are not legal advice, and no attorney/client relationship is created. Jay Moffitt claims no certification in this specialty, and TN does not offer a certification in this area of law. Copyright, Jay Moffitt, 2009. Comments are welcomed and will be answered promptly and courteously.